|After she explained it to me, she said that I could become one, I was thrilled–God could use a kid like me (from a drunken, abusive home, considered by most as “worthless”), to do something wonderful for Him!
Months later, after a choir practice, another lady asked me if I had invited Jesus into my heart. I answered “No.” She went on to explain Revelation 3:20 to me, and that I had to let Jesus come in. Well, as a kid, it only made sense to me that if someone was at a door, you let them in. So, with that understanding I asked Him in. However, as much as I knew He wanted to be in my heart, I felt like I was missing something. I was plagued by service with no peace–“doing”, but not “being”, that so many people face today.
I watched my husband make many decisions for Christ without victory–until April of 1980. After he had read the tract with the question, “Wouldn’t it be a shame to preach the gospel all your life, and then die and never receive it?” and then settled once and for all his relationship with Christ, there was a difference. Oh, his activities in church didn’t change much, but his attitude toward me did! Not knowing if this was real, or just a “guilt decision, ” I tested him for the next 15 months. It was real!
Because of this change, I began evaluating my own relationship with God and realized…there wasn’t one. On July 5, 1981, I asked Him to take all the broken pieces of my life and put them back in some kind of order, and make sense of it. I asked Christ into my heart that morning and got baptized the same afternoon.
Years later, my dream has come true–He has allowed me to be a missionary for Him!
|I watched how Christians acted and tried to do the same, but I could never find peace. Believing I needed to do more, I became very active in the local church I was attending. Over time I became a Youth Worker, ran several Gym Night programs, began preparing for the Ministry in studies, preaching, and doing whatever the Pastor needed to have done. But still, that nagging, emptiness in my heart…
“Finally, in one service the preacher remarked, “Wouldn’t it be a shame to preach the gospel all your life, and then die and never receive it?” That was me! I didn’t go forward in the invitation that night, but grabbed a tract on the way out. I didn’t know what it said until I got home. Going downstairs to my makeshift office of sheets hung as curtains, I pulled out the tract from my suit jacket. You can guess what it said–the very same words the preacher had said that night. “Wouldn’t it be ashame to preach the gospel all your life, and then die and never receive it?” It was as if God had hit me upside the head with a boulder.”
OK, Lord,” I said. “I’m done fighting.” That night I gave my life to Christ, and accepted His salvation on His terms and have never doubted it since. I fnally had the peace I had been searching for all those years.
It is my desire that others would come to know this same wonderful peace that comes only through Him.